I Wouldn’t Believe These Stories Either, but Hey, They Happened

You'll Never Believe
What Happened to Lacey
Crazy Stories about Racism
By Amber Ruffin & Lacey Lamar
Amazon ~ Powell's

Now a writer and performer on Late Night with Seth Meyers and host of The Amber Ruffin Show, Amber Ruffin lives in New York, where she is no one's First Black Friend and everyone is, as she puts it, "stark raving normal." But Amber's sister Lacey? She's still living in their home state of Nebraska, and trust us, you'll never believe what happened to Lacey.

From racist donut shops to strangers putting their whole hand in her hair, from being mistaken for a prostitute to being mistaken for Harriet Tubman, Lacey is a lightning rod for hilariously ridiculous yet all-too-real anecdotes. She's the perfect mix of polite, beautiful, petite, and Black that apparently makes people think, "I can say whatever I want to this woman." And now, Amber and Lacey share these entertainingly horrifying stories through their laugh-out-loud sisterly banter. Painfully relatable or shockingly eye-opening (depending on how often you have personally been followed by security at department stores), this book tackles modern-day racism with the perfect balance of levity and gravity.


I've been watching Late Night with Seth Meyers for a few years now, and have always loved Amber's segments. Whether it's Amber Says What, Point, Counterpoint, Jokes Seth Can't Tell, or now The Amber Ruffin Show on Peacock, she is always amazing at telling stories or quips filled with heart and humor. I feel like we got our first taste of her skill with finding the humor in dark situations when she shared stories of her run-ins with police following the murder of George Floyd in 2020. So it was with both eagerness and apprehension that I found this book. Sure, I knew I was in for some entertainment, but it's one of those things where you're not sure if you're supposed to laugh or just feel horrified.

Perhaps the best way to answer that question is from the authors:

Black readers will read these stories and feel that really good, yet terrible feeling of going through something bad and realizing you’re not alone, and not only that, but that someone else has it worse! And, hopefully, the white reader is gonna read this, feel sad, think a little about it, feel like an ally, come to a greater understanding of the DEPTH of this type of shit, and maybe walk away with a different point of view of what it’s like to be a Black American in the twenty-first century.
Hence this book. [Preface, 3%]

We are not into trying to educate white America, but maybe we accidentally did. Maybe white readers learned that just because your Black friends aren’t sitting you down, going over all their trauma with you, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist! Maybe you learned that racist stuff happens all the time. Maybe you’ve become emboldened to speak up when you see someone being a racist piece of shit. Maybe you’ve realized the racist piece of shit was you! I don’t know. I don’t know you like that.
And if you’re Black and got all the way to the end of this book, thank you. Thanks for walking through these personal and silly and dumb experiences with us. I know it may have brought up some hard shit, but it made us feel heard and worth your time. We want you to know that we support you in whatever decisions you make in situations like these. It is a lot to ask people to live in a place that would treat them like this AND ask them to be in charge of fixing it. People are just trying to cope. Having said that, if you feel like hurting some feelings, do it! If you feel like fighting for what you believe in, do it! If you feel like calling in sick, do it! Write down your grievances and put them in a book! Whatever! Do you! Truly, we are all just trying to get by. [pg 213, 99%]

Honestly, there's not much I want to say about this book other than you should read it. I mean, sure, I could tell you about the racist doughnut store, or the (multiple!) art teachers who terrorize kids, or the guy who refused to get an AC unit for the kitchen, or the JCPenney security team, or— you get the idea. But I would much, much rather you read about them yourself!

This book is full of humor and wit, as well as a sprinkling of horror, making it that much harder to describe. The summary's claim of a "perfect balance of levity and gravity" is certainly apt. It brings up instances of racism, both malicious and unintentional, with such a conversational tone that it was easy to find myself giggling even as horrific events were unfolding. Obviously it may hit other people differently, and that's to be expected, but I honestly think this can act as both a educational tool, and a bit of catharsis depending on the reader.

There was one part of the book that kinda disappointed me... You know how I mentioned her sharing her run-ins with police on Late Night? Well, all four of those stories are shared in the book—three during a chapter about police, and one as part of another 3-story segment called Guess the Theme. Now, I don't know which came first, her deciding to include some police stories in the book and then deciding to share them on the show, or her sharing them on the show prompting her to include them in the book (though I assume the latter). Regardless, all four stories are nearly word-for-word what she said on the show. I can't really fault her for telling her stories the way she wants to, and the stories she tells are all very impactful, but I was kinda bummed that I'd already heard something (again, word-for-word) in a new book. I will link the video in question below for any who are interested, since I think they come through a bit better in the original, but don't be surprised when you recognize them when you're reading.

Overall, this was a book I won't soon forget. I'd highly recommend it to everyone who enjoys witty writing and personal storytelling, but also those interested in memoirs, social justice, comedy, contemporary America, creative non-fiction, or the Black experience. And if you're not yet sold, here's the aforementioned peek at Amber's chapter on police, as well as a little of the performance you can expect from the amazing audiobook:

Read by Amber Ruffin & Lacey Lamar
Unabridged Length: 5.4 Hours
Listened at 1.5x Speed

I actually started reading this book without the audio. I made it about halfway through before getting the whim to check on the audio. Seeing that it was read by the authors, and loving Amber's delivery as much as her wit, I decided to start the whole book over again just to hear them.

So, I decided it'd probably be weird to have the audio super-speed for a voice I've heard before, so instead of my usual 2x playback speed, I went down to normal speed. Guys, I think they might have slowed them down in post-production because I have never heard Amber sound like that. 1.25x sounded pretty near to her normal Late Show speed, with 1.5x sounding only a little forced, so that's what I ended up sticking with. So yeah, if you're familiar with Amber from any of her segments or shows, you might want to start out at 1.25x for sanity's sake.

Right off the bat, this audiobook made its mark. During the introduction there's a story about how a lady at a checkout stand thought Lacey put her own picture on her checks, and then they have a picture to help deliver the punchline. In the audiobook, we instead hear:

"Now, this is the audiobook, so what you can't see is this check with Harriet Tubman's picture. And then we've put Lacey's picture in Harriet Tubman's place on the exact same check. They do not look alike."

There are a few more times in which they point out that "because this is an audiobook, you can't see this picture," and then go on to describe it and what your reaction would no doubt be (ie, these two things are in no way alike!). They also cut the quick back and forth that the book has describing which font represents Amber and which represents Lacey, since we're listening to voices instead of seeing fonts, duh! And a couple times they even include an audiobook exclusive, like recreating the secret knock of JCPenney security, or Amber's amazing singing voice!

Having experienced audiobooks that go out of their way to include Every. Single. Word. Of. Text. even if they're mostly there for a visual quirk (like a receipt included for a scrapbook-y feel, or the full header of each and every email), it was so refreshing to experience a production that actually edits the content. It's this dedication to the storytelling and the comedy, rather than just straight recitation, that really set this audiobook apart. Sure, one could argue that the huge difference between the audio and text means that it's not unabridged. But it's mostly just to keep it flowing like a natural conversation ("y'all" in the text becomes "you guys", or visa versa) or describing visuals, as photos are necessary for some of the stories. It also doesn't hurt that the authors are doing the narration, too.

Now, there were a couple times where the text did have major differences from the audio, like one part that changed a name entirely (Dana in the eBook vs Danita in the audio). I assume, since the eBook can be edited even after publication, that the name was changed afterward either for the sake of privacy or correction. Since this doesn't really affect the reading experience I don't think it's a detriment to the recording, just something I thought I'd mention in case—I dunno—you decided to bring up this specific instance to a friend who read the book and you get into an argument over what this girl's name was.

Overall, this was a pinnacle of what audiobook productions should strive to be. Sure, most audiobooks are created just for inclusivity/profit's sake, but for those of us who use them regularly, it really does make a huge impact when it's obvious how much care and thought and effort goes in to making them special. When it's obvious that someone took the time to realize it makes more sense to call the audience "listener" instead of "reader", or that a photo needs to be described, or that you can SING in audiobooks! It just makes it all that much more memorable and recommendable, ya know? So yes, obviously I would highly recommend checking out this audiobook regardless of whether you're a regular listener or just starting out. Think of it like a multi-part podcast. You'll thank me for it.